Communication

In Hirav Shah’s Words, It is the transfer of an idea or thought from one being to another, when the recipient’s comprehension / understanding of the idea / thought is the same as or similar to the transmitter.

The mode or medium isn’t important, but the effectiveness of transmission & reception is, Says Hirav Shah, Thought Leader and Business Strategist.

The Importance Of Communication

We all have a strong need for connectivity and belonging. This is why positive social interactions increase our subjective wellbeing and provide greater life satisfaction.

It is the relationship with people that makes life worth living “, Quotes Hirav Shah.

Nursing social relationships enhance happiness because spending time with friends or colleagues or partners builds positive emotions—a key component of happiness.

Interactions with people can be verbal or nonverbal—we can even connect with each other through a smile. A vital element of positive social interaction, however, is good communication, Says Hirav Shah.

Effective Ways Of Communication In A Relationship

One of the best ways to communicate effectively is “listen first, speak second.“, Quotes Hirav Shah.

Really cultivate the desire to know your partner and their needs/desires – before the need to make yours known. If you do this, your partner will extend the courtesy back, because they feel heard, Says Shah.

Good communication is at the heart of good relationships“, Quotes Shah.

And good communication is achieved through –

1. Listening

One of the most important communication skills is listening. Deep, positive relationships can only be developed by listening to each other . If there is no communication in your relationship, maybe neither party is truly listening; instead, maybe both people are just trying to prove they are right.

2.Don’t Do Anything Else

You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time.

Here are the most common listening mistakes:

  • Daydreaming or thinking of something else while another person is speaking;
  • Thinking of what to say next;
  • Judging what the other person is saying;
  • Listening with a specific goal/outcome in mind.

But Active Listening is so much more than not talking. It is an art that requires a genuine interest in the other person, a curiosity rather than an anticipative mind.

Active listening involves:

1.Nonverbal involvement (show your attention)
2.Paying attention to your vis-à-vis, not your own thoughts
3.No judgment
4.Tolerating silence

So, you got the key now.
Now, communication in your relationship should be really easy” – Says Hirav Shah.

However, Hirav Shah mentions some vital additional techniques to improve communication in personal and intimate relationships.

1.Ask about their well-being everyday

Check in every day.
Asking “How are you?
How was your day?”

This will not only keep you in touch and in sync, it’ll help keep you in the habit of communicating with each other.

2. Don’t Decipher What’s In Their Mind

Sometimes you can tell just by looking at someone what they may be feeling. It’s not always easy to do this and let’s face it: as much as we want to be mind readers, we aren’t and shouldn’t have to be. So, if you’re not sure what your partner is feeling, ask them.

If you’re the one holding things in and expecting your partner to read your mind, take a moment to appreciate the fact that your partner is making an effort by asking you what’s going on rather than ignoring the problem. Do your best to let them know how you’re feeling when you’re ready to open up about it. It’s not healthy to say you’re okay when you’re not and then get mad at your partner for not figuring it out. Be honest about how you feel to the best of your ability, and try to express it in a healthy way before it gets to the point where it blows up and someone says something they regret. Being direct is always better than being passive aggressive.

If your partner is the one who is guilty of being passive aggressive, try letting them know that it’s not really helpful for either of you when they’re not honest about how they feel. Of course, it’s awesome when we know each other so well that we can practically read each other’s’ thoughts and know exactly what to say in the right moments, but we’re human and we may make mistakes sometimes or miss cues that seem obvious to our partner or vice versa. It’s important that you both make an effort to better understand each other and be patient with each other, too.

3. Listening Is The Key, We Told You

Listen, Listen, Listen.

Communication isn’t just about talking, it’s about being an active listener.

Who is an active listener?
One who listens to what his/her partner says, rather than getting defensive, without understanding the partner’s point of view or where they’re coming from. So make sure you’re really in the moment.

4.Have compassion

As you listen to your partner with empathy and feel what he-she feels, you gain compassion for him-her as a person. You feel for him-her as a human being with personal pain and struggles like the rest of us.

You gain a new perspective. When you feel for your partner’s issues, your own personal over-reactions to them seem unimportant. Giving advice or being judgmental suddenly seems condescending and patronizing. Acting hurt or victimized suddenly seems childish and self-indulgent. From this perspective, you see your partner as a separate person who you care about deeply as he-she deals with his-her own issues in life.

5. Develop The “Communication” Skill

Communication is a Skill.
Ultimately, communication is a skill, which means there’s always room for improvement. Work together with your partner to figure out how you can maintain healthy communication and stay on the same page. Be as honest, direct, kind, and thoughtful as you can. Whether it’s with a Bae Sesh, or simply making a bigger effort to open up to each other.

Final Thoughts

Remember, the secret to living is giving.

Giving is our source of meaning – it determines who we become and solidifies our legacy, who we are and our role in the world. Consider what you give to your partner and how you can give more. Are you giving your time? Your undivided attention? The benefit of the doubt? A second chance? When communication in relationships is strong, both partners are able to continually come up with new and better ways of contributing to the other’s happiness.

Don’t say, just show.
Don’t speak, just act.
Don’t interrupt, just listen.
Don’t promise, just prove.” – Quotes Shah.